My Eats

How "The Accidental Fat Chick" Hatched...

Welcome to The Accidental Fat Chick's new online home!

During the summer 0f 2008, I woke up one morning with a drive to live a healthy lifestyle. Since then, I've made many changes and lost nearly 50 pounds. Many of my friends and family members have come to me, asking about what I'm doing & how I'm doing it. While I certainly would never claim to be an expert, I'm happy to share what I've learned along the way.

So after careful thought... "The Accidental Fat Chick" has hatched... with the hope of helping at least one person and to be the accountability I need to finish what I started. :)

Thank you for visiting!!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Here She Comes...

My Mother -remember her, the third member of the conspiracy? - is coming to stay with us for a week. I'm bringing her home with me after kids group tonight. After weeks of constant complaints about us not spending enough time with her, she agreed to come here to visit. Now I know this won't stop her complaints because she has this need for us to visit her at her house... but its the best I can do right now.

These visits cause me a huge heap of STRESS! She expects to be catered to when she is here & will go hungry for hours rather than pour herself a bowl of cereal. And if I'm puttering around the house doing housework or whatever she gets upset because she can't "visit" with me. Can you imagine how she's going to react when I disappear for three (or more ) hours to hit the gym?
Those things are annoying, but the biggest stress comes from getting a true picture of her poor health. When she is at our house she does one of two things - sits in a chair trying to look at magazines (which she can barely do with her low vision) or sleeps. She has sleep apnea and is supposed to sleep with one of those breathing machines - she refuses to use it. Its obvious when you spend any real time with her that she has NO energy and is so physically weak that even walking a block is too much for her. Its sad and frustrating for me because I know she could be doing things to take better care of herself but - as I've talked about before - she doesn't think she's worth the effort.... which is where another chunk of the stress heap comes in...

Its like a healthy lifestyle pushes all of her buttons & she has a temper tantrum (for lack of a better term) - sometimes mini & sometimes full blown. I've taken her to the store & literally had her in tears for suggesting that chicken breasts might be a better option than ground beef. It used to be that I would do an "extra good job" of setting an example when she was here... which just lead to meltdown after meltdown. So lately I've been pretty laid back with my routine when she has stayed with us... BUT I CANNOT DO THAT THIS TIME... not for a whole week & not in the middle of this gym challenge. I just can't. So I can imagine the meltdowns are coming... and I don't feel like I can deal with that right now either... better to deal with that than another gain on the scale though.

The Husband and I were actually discussing this for quite awhile this morning and - hold the applause here lol - we agreed that the house will be business as usual for the duration of her visit. He of course was full things he'll say to her if she starts butting in - I so wonder what would happen if he ever actually said any of the things he comes up with. Anyway, that means my typical gym routine (on overdrive for the challenge), the healthiest meals possible (except for Saturday night dinner might be a splurge) and no unnecessary trips to stores. This is just the way it has to be... I cannot get derailed... especially after last week.

Is it bad that The Husband and I are taking bets on how long it will take her to come up with a reason to need to go to a store? Plus, we're taking bets on what she'll actually buy at the store if she gets in the door of one. I say Nacho Cheese Doritos. He says frozen pizza. I would agree on the pizza, but I'm betting she'll be suggesting we order it from somewhere before the week is over.

That's what happening here... what's going on in your world this week?


Drazil said...

OMG -you sweet little chick. I feel bad for you - I wish I could make this easier for you but I think you have the right idea....go about life as usual...she's an outside force and you still have control of your eating, your actions, your words- all of it - she only takes control of that if you let her. So hard - but I know you can do it! We're all here for you so come here and vent the frustations okay? Smooches!

MaryFran said...

Hold firm in your convictions. You are worth it (it being dealing with the meltdowns). Just remind her (during and after the meltdowns) that she raised you to take care of yourself and this is what you are doing now. (ok, maybe she didn't....but a little white lie will only help!)

Crys said...

May the forces be with you!:) All I can say is continue to set a good example. Cook the foods you want your family to eat and maybe she'll follow suit. Whatever happen, YOU stay the course. :)

cmoursler said... mil had a fit last time she was here because she just had to have her pb&J sandwiches..I am going to her house in june/july and I am planning ahead.
I will not eat crap.
I don't care what they think.
Stick to your guns and let her melt.
It can only make you stronger.